Another feeble attempt at humor!
My brother Bill sent this to me… Thanks Bill!
Winston Churchill had a very sarcastic humor!
When Insults Had Class:
“He has all the virtues I dislike and none of the vices I admire.”
— Winston Churchill
“I have never killed a man, but I have read many obituaries with great pleasure.”
– Clarence Darrow
“He has never been known to use a word that might send a reader to the dictionary.”
– William Faulkner
(about Ernest Hemingway)
“I’ve had a perfectly wonderful evening. But this wasn’t it.”
Groucho Marx
“I didn’t attend the funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of it.”
– Mark Twain
“He has no enemies, but is intensely disliked by his friends.”
Oscar Wilde
“I am enclosing two tickets to the first night of my new play; bring a friend… If you have one.”
– George Bernard Shaw
to Winston Churchill… followed by Churchill’s response:
“Cannot possibly attend first night, will attend second, if there is one.”
– Winston Churchill
“I feel so miserable without you; it’s almost like having you here.”
– Stephen Bishop
“He is a self-made man and worships his creator.”
– John Bright
“I’ve just learned about his illness. Let’s hope it’s nothing trivial.”
– Irvin S. Cobb
“He is not only dull himself; he is the cause of dullness in others.”
– Samuel Johnson
“He is simply a shiver looking for a spine to run up.”
– Paul Keating
“He had delusions of adequacy.”
— Walter Kerr
“Why do you sit there looking like an envelope without any Address on it?”
– Mark Twain
“His mother should have thrown him away and kept the stork.”
– Mae West
“Some cause happiness wherever they go; others, whenever they
go.”
– Oscar Wilde
Lady Astor once remarked to Winston Churchill at a Dinner Party, “Winston, if you were my husband, I would poison your coffee!” Winston replied, “Madam if I were your husband I would drink it!”
